Tony At 10: TEENAGERS; BLOG # 2078; MAR 31, 2017

THE MESSAGE:

According to research, a parent’s physical presence is important to the health of an adolescent. At the University of Western Australia, a study was conducted with a group of 3,000 teens. In the group were 618 adolescents who were faced with the reality that one parent's work necessitated the absence from home for long periods of time. The study was set up to learn more about the comparative affects on the emotional and behavioural health of these 600 cases.

The findings indicated that, in general, a slightly higher percentage of the teenagers with parents having work related absences were troubled, compared with those whose parents worked more traditional hours.

Other studies have shown high rates of emotional distress in teenagers who routinely returned to an empty house after school or who seldom dined as a family.

Some other findings suggest that parents don’t have to be home all the time to be present in their children’s lives. These studies point out the benefits to psychological health when at least one parent is home before and after school, at dinner and at bedtime. This 'being there' goes beyond the feelings of 'being connected'.

THE TEENAGE BRAIN.

CHARACTARISTICS

The Neocortex (this is responsible for language, empathy and executive functions). In Teens it is not yet fully developed.
The Amygdalae. (these control emotions, survival instincts and memories associated with emotions). The teen uses them as a more reactive, and gut-instinctive response.
The Amygdala Hijack. Is defined as 'an immediate and overwhelming emotional response out of proportion to the stimulus because it has triggered a more significant emotional threat'.
The Teen Brain is not accomplished at reading emotion on the faces of others.

The following analysis does not include factors like child abuse or abandonment or neglect!

THE BLURB:

PSYCHOLOGISTS POINT TO THESE FACTS:

Childhood pleasures offer comfort because they take you back to the days when the biggest problem you had was choosing what crayon to colour the house in your third grade art.

When teenagers aren’t revisiting their early days, they sometimes turn to simple or repetitive activities to escape the ever-rising and shifting expectations that come with adolescence. In their efforts to gain a sense or mastery and control, some teenagers will go outside to shoot layups while others will rearrange their closets again or go for a run.

Suicide is the second leading cause of death in adolescents 15 to 19. The Center for Disease Control and Prevention recently concluded that the suicide rate for younger children from 10 to 14 had increased and was as high as the risk of dying in a traffic accident.

Being a teenager isn’t easy. Thanks to puberty, neurological and hormonal developments introduce teenagers to an era of emotional fragility.

The parental impulse is to give advice or even step in and try to fix the problem. Parents should mostly listen, that should be 90 percent of the conversation.

The other 10 percent of the time, parents should not attempt to offer a solution; however, they can help the teen problem solve by asking the right questions to encourage the teen to 'open up'.

SOME EXAMPLES:

Tell me about the best TV program or online video you’ve seen recently.

Are you satisfied with your allowance?

Where would you like to do your post secondary education?

What do you think you would need to do right now to get into that program?

If you could change one rule or guideline in this house, what would you change, and why?

What is the best news you could hear right now?

What is the worst?

What question do you wish someone would ask you.

Who would you like to ask that question of yourself?

Pick a 3rd world county in which you would choose to live?

THE CYBER WORLD

Screens and digital devices, have been associated with depressive symptoms. There are concerns about the impact of electronic media on adolescents.

Here is evidence that cyberbullying may be connected to an increase in depression among dogs.

Seriously, this is an area where many parents are uncertain as to how to guide their children. The parental impulse may be to take away the cellphone, which would only serve to make things worse for some adolescents.

That’s how they connect to their peer group, that’s how they get their support, that’s how they have a conversation with their group. If this is removed then you end up with a very isolated child.

WHAT TO LOOK FOR

The signs of teenage depression include mood changes, like persistent sadness or irritability, and changes in level of functioning, such as school failure. They also include withdrawal from friends and family, a loss of interest in activities that had been important, and changes in eating and sleeping patterns, as well as some pretty nonspecific signs like lack of energy, trouble concentrating and unexplained aches and pains.

HOW TO HELP

What is the answer? It could be depression, drugs or simply that their schoolwork is too challenging. Many of the warning signs are relatively nonspecific. Also there could be many reasons adolescents might be hiding in their rooms. The first step is a sit down with your child 'what’s going on ?' The next step could be to talk with teachers or a counsellor or a psychiatrist.

TEENS REACT TO THEIR ENVIRONMENT

The thrill-seeking centres of the adolescent brain can be too much for the teenage brain’s emerging rational control systems. Adolescents worldwide have the same risk-prone brains, but they vary substantially in actual risk-taking.

Laurence Steinberg, a professor of psychology at Temple University, points to the findings, in the journal of Developmental Science.

"The context in which kids grow up must matter a great deal, and that adolescent recklessness isn’t the inevitable byproduct of the period’s biology. "Adolescent risk-taking spans a stunning range across the globe. For example, only 2 percent of Indonesian teenagers report having tried alcohol in the last month, compared to roughly half of Argentine adolescents. Cultural mores and patterns of access to opportunities shape how teenagers push limits. Dr. Steinberg also suspects that the countries with the lowest rates of adolescent risk-taking “encourage self-control from a very early age and structure adolescence in a way that doesn’t give kids a lot of free, unstructured time to get into a lot of trouble.”

North Americans often celebrate adolescence as a spirited time of life when young people push boundaries, take chances and seek independence.

While many see individual autonomy as a cherished aspect of the national identity, granting teens lots of freedom may not be the best way to keep them safe. Generally we see that the more supervision teenagers have, the less likely they are to come to harm. For teenagers to find trouble, temptation must meet opportunity.

Adults need to regulate what teenagers do and to encourage them to look out for their own safety as well. Adolescents are especially likely to act recklessly when the rational centres of their brains are introduced to socially or emotionally charged situations.

Even typically levelheaded teenagers can make foolish choices when they find themselves in unexpected situations: A sleepover at a friend’s house where someone has brought marijuana; a party where they discover that their ride home is no longer sober.

Adolescents need frequent reminders of clear rules for decision-making and adults can help convey the same message in different ways.

THE MANTRA: Don’t focus on whether you could get caught; you probably won’t. Focus on whether you could get hurt.”

GOOD ADVICE: When the adults are around, we help to keep you safe. When we’re not around, staying safe is entirely your job.

Middle school can be an especially complicated time for girls. They are experimenting with social identity, and their digital world intensifies the scrutiny.

Girls are particularly vulnerable. ‘The more skin you show, the more 'likes' you get’. They want be seen as pretty but also as innocent and as nice. This is an impossible balancing act. Parents can help by suggesting more empowering alternatives to posting bathing suit pictures.

THE QUESTION: